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Cassie Q

Bubbles, Part 2


So the Holidays are getting closer, and given my long history of Christmas meltdowns, this year I promised I'd try to be as positive as possible. In honor of that, I am sharing this comic about a brighter side of my life. I'm sorry that it's not very Christmassy, but it's all the positive I could find, for now.

Last week I shared a comic about being left on the outside of the normalcy bubble, and the pain it causes me to live so alienated from everything I wished to be a part of of. The pain is real and never ending, and in situations like parties or anything short lasting, I usually end up going home feeling miserable, but this is about what happens when you've been an outsider for long enough. And what happens is that once I acclimate to my new reality of "okay, I'm at a new social environment where no one wants to be around me", I eventually start to notice other outsiders.

And this is when magic happens, really. Outsiders are such a mixed bag of different people who are there for such a huge variety of reasons, that it's never the concise long lasting community I hope to be a part of, but at the same time, this heterogeneity allows me to be in contact with so many different perspectives, and it's crazy how much I've grown from these experiences. One thing interesting about having a disability is that people will hardly ever approach you with a personal agenda or with a tainted perception of you.. If they are there it's because they see me for who I am, and they genuinely like being around me. Even if I have to convince them that I'm likable, because some of them are so grumpy, but it doesn't matter, because I don't mind putting some effort into interactions that eventually become the purest friendships I've had, and the purest connections few people will ever have the chance to find in their lives.

So nowadays I try not too be too upset about bubbles I'm not allowed into, because living on the outside has taught me things that most of those on the inside would never even grasp on, and although alienating, I try to have faith on the long run, and how this is just a part of becoming the better version of me.

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